Lady Gaga kills Santa

Thought you were in line for some pretty sweet gifts this year from Santa? Well think again. Gaga’s killed him.
Well, not the actual Santa (obviously, he’s busy in Lapland) but she unleashed seven shades of hell onto a Santa doll thrown up at her on stage at her London 02 gig last night.
“I hate the holidays. I’m so alone and miserable,” she said, picking up a St Nic doll from a fan,
biting off its head and smashing it to smithereens with her stiletto.
“You f*****g little stuffed bit of joy. He was pregnant with chemicals not meant for children.
“Now I’ve killed Santa!”
Gaga was in town for her sell-out arena tour, The Monsters Ball, and alongside it being the best show we’ve seen all year by miles she also took the time to clear up those rumours.
“I don’t know if you’ve heard but I have a really big c**k. I’ve heard there’s some pretty big c**ks in this arena. Now dance, motherf*****s!”
Wow. Someone’s getting a lump of coal in their stocking this year…
She’s still our hero though.